Appropriated 2015.jpg

Appropriated Artist Statement, 2015

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The Pact. The social structure that allows the predators to hide in plain sight, to sit at the bar at the same table with everyone, take a target home, rape her, and stay in the same social circle because she can’t or won’t tell anyone, or because nobody does anything if she does.[1] Always be alert always pay attention always watch your back always be aware of your surroundings and never let your guard down for a moment lest you be sexually assaulted and if you are and didn’t follow all the rules it’s your fault.[2] People talk about sexual assault like it’s a bad habit that men have.[3] But you know exactly what kind of world we live in.[4] Eight percent of college men have either attempted or successfully raped. Thirty percent say they would rape if they could get away with it. When the wording was changed to “force a woman to have sex,” the number jumped to fifty-eight percent.[5] Young men need to be socialized in such a way that rape is as unthinkable to them as cannibalism.[6]

Healing from rape is a long journey. PTSD means I cannot erase what happened to me.[7] One of the most painful parts for survivors is having to deal with how much we blame ourselves for being assaulted.[8] Rape culture is a culture in which people who have survived a violent crime are asked to laugh about it because other people think it’s funny.[9] Violence does not always take visible form, and not all wounds gush blood.[10] The only thing I know is this: I am full of wounds and still standing on my feet.[11] It’s no use going back to yesterday, because I was a different person then.[12]

We are more than the worst thing that’s ever happened to us. All of us need to stop apologizing for having been to hell and come back breathing.[13] How can you change something if you won’t even acknowledge its existence, or if you downplay its significance?[14] You can never run away. Not ever. The only way out is in.[15] That is all I want in life: for this pain to seem purposeful.[16] It’s said it takes seven years to grow completely new skin cells. To think…I will grow into a body you never will have touched.[17]

Hope has two beautiful daughters. Their names are anger and courage; anger at the way things are, and courage to see that they do not remain the way they are.[18] No feeling is final.[19] Survival is a talent.[20] I have woven a parachute out of everything broken.[21] Practicing an art, no matter how well or badly, is a way to make your soul grow, for heaven’s sake.[22] You’re still going to get criticized, so you might as well do whatever the fuck you want.[23] If you are silent about your pain, they will kill you and say you enjoyed it.[24] No one can tell what goes on in between the person you were and the person you become. No one can chart that blue and lonely section of hell. There are no maps of the change. You just come out the other side.

Or you don’t.[25]

_______________

[1] “Meet the Predators” https://yesmeansyesblog.wordpress.com/2009/11/12/meet-the-predators/

[2] Melissa McEwan “Rape Culture 101” http://www.shakesville.com/2009/10/rape-culture-101.html

[3] Jon Stewart

[4] Junot Diaz, The Brief Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao p. 194

[5] Margo Maine, Body Wars: Making Peace with Women's Bodies (An Activist's Guide) p. 152

[6] Mary Pipher, Reviving Ophelia p. 230

[7] http://ptsdconfessions.tumblr.com/

[8] Melissa Harris-Perry “Open Letter to Serena Williams” http://www.msnbc.com/melissa-harris-perry/serena-williams-its-never-good-blame-r

[9] http://www.shakesville.com/2010/10/quote-of-day_20.html

[10] Haruki Murakami, IQ84 p. 303

[11] Nikos Kazantzakis https://www.goodreads.com/author/quotes/5668.Nikos_Kazantzakis

[12] Lewis Carroll, Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland p. 86

[13] Clementine von Radics, “Broken” http://clementinevonradicspoems.tumblr.com/post/108064336892/let-it-heal-you-tell-your-mother-let-it-heal

[14] Junot Diaz, “Interview with Paula M.L. Moya” http://bostonreview.net/books-ideas/paula-ml-moya-decolonial-love-interview-junot-d%C3%ADaz

[15] Junot Diaz, The Brief Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao p. 199

[16] Elizabeth Wurtzel, Prozac Nation p. 44

[17] Brett E. Jenkins, http://www.goodreads.com/quotes/581661-it-s-said-it-takes-seven-years-to-grow-completely-new

[18] St. Augustine of Hippo, Spirituality and Liberation: Overcoming the Great Fallacy by Robert Mcafee Brown, p. 136

[19] Rainer Maria Rilke, “Go to the Limits of Your Longing” from Book of Hours p. 88

[20] Susanna Kaysen, Girl, Interrupted

[21] William Stafford https://www.goodreads.com/author/quotes/40274.William_Stafford

[22] Kurt Vonnegut, A Man Without a Country p. 24

[23] Kathleen Hanna http://golddustcori.tumblr.com/post/48174777016/youre-still-going-to-get-criticized-so-you-might

[24] Zora Neale Hurston http://www.goodreads.com/quotes/409934-if-you-are-silent-about-your-pain-they-ll-kill-you

[25] Stephen King, The Stand p. 547-548